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[Intro] <br/>Who made this beat? <br/>Twysted Genius, baby <br/> <br/>[Chorus: Lil Baby] <br/>If I sell my soul, I'll take it back, I'm slime forever (Gimme that) <br/>I put bust down on the whole gang, we gon' shine together <br/>She got Rollies on her timepiece when she step out, she be flashin' <br/>Whenever we get alone, I give her half and she get nasty <br/>My jeans is special edition, Amiri send me these pants <br/>And now everybody be tough, is he gangster or he just actin'? <br/>Ain't got no card, don't do no fraud, seem like all of my bitches plastic <br/>Know you niggas don't want smoke, let's see who run it up the fastest <br/>Keep that fire when I'm cold, I can't let them catch me lackin' <br/>I don't know if they think I'm sweet because I'm rappin' <br/>But fuck 'em, we get active (Get active) <br/> <br/>[Verse 1: Lil Baby] <br/>Wrap it, make sure they can't smell it <br/>Drive too far? Don't matter, I'll mail it <br/>Tryna steal swag, I see it, I smell it <br/>Used to get mad, probably beat up my celly <br/>Now I sell bags every day in my city <br/>Ain't doin' no playin', when they come, be ready <br/>I got murder on my mind like that lil' nigga Melly (Free Melly) <br/>Big boy rocks, stud the same size as Nelly (Ten karats) <br/>Long as I live, I'ma get this cheddar <br/>Ever since the bitch left, doin' lil' better <br/>Which car I'ma drive? It depends on the weather <br/>Rolls Royce truck pull up like, \
⏲ 3:22 👁 15K
Comedy Central Stand-Up
⏲ 1 hour 5 minutes 52 seconds 👁 467.4K
LenDog
⏲ 44 seconds 👁 6.2K
The Los Angeles Police Department may look into the alleged backstage encounter between Justin Bieber and Mariah Yeater.<br/>http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/entertainment/2011/11/can-justin-bieber-brush-off...<br/><br/>Bieber was just 16 at the time of alleged incident, which would seem to leave Yeater vulnerable to statutory rape charges.<br/>http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2057195/Justin-Bieber-baby-Pictu...<br/><br/>Meanwhile, the full paternity complaint is now available online. Yeater's $300-per-hour lawyers Lance Rogers and Mathew Pare estimate that Bieber earns $4.5 million monthly, yet they are asking for just $12,000 per month in expenses.<br/>http://www.lrogerslaw.com<br/>http://www.mattpare.com/Personal-Injury-Attorney.aspx<br/><br/>$5,000 a month in child care<br/>$500 a month in child's health care<br/>$1,500 a month for travel expenses<br/>$4000 a month for child's education<br/><br/>According to the document, Yeater owes Bank of America $200 and a hospital $25,000 for the birth of her child.<br/><br/>Yeater seeks evidence to confirm the child was fathered by Bieber. The pop star has been asked to respond to the complain in court on December 15, 2011.<br/><br/>Yeater's statement appears below:<br/><br/>On the night of October 25, 2010, I attended a Justin Bieber concert at the Staples Center in Los Angeles, California. I was 19 years old at the time and near the front row at the concert.<br/><br/>Immediately following the concert, I was approached by a security guard who asked if I wanted to meet Justin Bieber backstage. I accepted the invitation and followed him backstage.<br/><br/>After waiting for a short period of time with several other young women, Justin Bieber appeared and engaged me in conversation.<br/><br/>Immediately, it was obvious that we were mutually attracted to one another, and we began to kiss. Shortly thereafter, Justin Bieber suggested that I go with him to a private place where we could be alone.<br/><br/>I agreed to go with him and on the walk to a private area in the Staples Center he told me he wanted to make love to me and that this was going to be his first time.<br/><br/>He also said he would give me his phone number after we had sex and told me he wanted me to be at his future concerts too and he would give me backstage passes.<br/><br/>After walking away from the other people backstage, Justin Bieber found a place where we could be alone -- a bathroom.<br/><br/>We went inside and immediately his personality changed drastically. He began touching me and repeatedly said he wanted to fuck the shit out of me.<br/><br/>At the time I asked him to put on a condom for protection but he insisted that he did not want to. In his own words, he said that because it was his first time, he wanted to feel everything.<br/><br/>Justin Bieber then quickly took off my clothes and we had sex. He was on top of me with my legs around him. At the time I was on some type of shelf. The sexual intercourse itself was brief, lasting only approximately 30 seconds.<br/><br/>After Justin Bieber came inside me he was clearly embarrassed about how the sex did not last very long.<br/><br/>He immediately put on his clothes and blew me off when I asked about seeing him again. I asked him for his private phone number, but he insisted on taking my phone number. We had no paper or anything to write it down on, and Justin Bieber was clearly not interested in getting his cell phone or any paper. He said he would just remember the number, which I told him.<br/><br/>When I later realized I was pregnant with Justin Bieber's baby I tried to contact him through his representatives but no one ever called me back.<br/><br/>On July 6 2011, I gave birth to a baby boy, that was exactly 36 weeks and 2 days after the sexual encounter with Justin Bieber. Based upon the timing as well as the fact that there were no other possible men that I had sex with that could be the father of this baby, I believe that Justin Bieber is in fact the father of my baby.
⏲ 2:15 ✓ 20-Mar-2024
The Onion
⏲ 2 minutes 30 seconds 👁 3.8M
WorldPrimateSafaris
⏲ 3 minutes 33 seconds 👁 3.7M
Another poop that's too long to watch in it's entirety. Scotaloo and sweaty bell team open to get their cutty marks.<br/><br/>S.N.D.E.I.R.F. lyrics for the jimmies out there:<br/>So no one(pony) told you life was gunna be this gay<br/>It's like you're always stuck in gay sex<br/>Your mother warned you there'd be incest<br/>I'll butt fuck you<br/>When the rain starts to fall
⏲ 8:9 ✓ 19-Mar-2024
Netflix Is A Joke
⏲ 4 minutes 22 seconds 👁 30.5K
bonobohandshake
⏲ 1 minute 30 seconds 👁 401.8K
by The Midnight Beast<br/>He's Extraterrestrial, but he doesn't have any testicles.<br/>PERVERTED ALIEN<br/><br/>He's got a dirty mind, he's full of milky rays<br/>He's tryna shoot his space-gun at uranus<br/>Unreliable, he's messy got bad eating habits<br/>He's so fucked up-up-up-up<br/>Taylor imma' let you finish<br/><br/>After I destroy another fairly decent song<br/>With rhymes about how rich I am so you can sing-along<br/>Wait hang on Kanye, ain't this song about an Alien?<br/>My raps don't make sense mother-fucker, I'm just having fun!<br/><br/>We found an Alien friend<br/>He would show us magic<br/>Thought he was fantastic<br/><br/>Till our Alien friend<br/>Raided mum and dads drawer<br/>He found some viagra<br/><br/>He would sex anything<br/>He would sex a bread-loaf<br/>He would sex a Ear lobe<br/><br/>It's so heartbreaking<br/>He's a sex abuser<br/>Futuristic loser<br/><br/>He needs some help, got serious problems<br/>He used to be nice<br/>Now he thinks with his dick, but does he even have one<br/><br/>Pervy, per-per-pervy<br/>I wanna be your best friend<br/>But you're such a bell-end<br/><br/>Creepy-cr-cr-creepy<br/>You never come out drinking<br/>You're too busy wanking<br/><br/>Perverted Alien<br/>He likes boys but he's not gay-lian<br/>He's superflexible<br/>But he doesn't have any genitals<br/><br/>I know a bar out in mars<br/>Where they driving spaceships instead of cars<br/>Kanye what you smoking, your lyrics don't make sense<br/>Yeah and i just read your twitter man, those tweets are quite intense<br/>When will this end, Alien friend?<br/>Tell me what's next? Can-ye-av-a-west?<br/>He's a sex addict<br/>Addicted till he's had it<br/>Sees a boob he grabs it<br/>Sees a boob he grabs it<br/>Sees a boob, that's three boobs,<br/>One more boob he grabs it... (WHAT?! IT WAS HIM!!)<br/><br/>Pervy, per-per-pervy<br/>I wanna be your best friend<br/>But you're such a bell-end<br/><br/>Creepy-cr-cr-creepy<br/>You never come out drinking<br/>You're too busy wanking<br/><br/>Perverted Alien<br/>He's not winner, he's way more fail-ian<br/>He doesn't get sex-at-all<br/>'Cause he doesn't have any genitals<br/><br/>They callin him an alien, a big pervert alien<br/>It's cause he's an alien, a big pervert alien<br/>
⏲ 3:33 ✓ 19-Mar-2024
Oh Bé
⏲ 4 minutes 35 seconds 👁 72.3K
Lovely Baby Monkey
⏲ 1 minute 12 seconds 👁 50.2K
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